Dragging Main – Mumbai and Middle East style

By Tom Mueller

It seems that every town has at least one place where young couples go to get away from family and daily pressures so they can just enjoy each other’s company. In many communities, it’s a back road, park or other public area.

I’ve experienced this first-hand in America, and witnessed it in other places such as India and the Middle East. The contrasts are striking.

In America, the locations where young people gather varies by town. In smaller communities most of that action takes place along Main Street – the main commercial area of town where the local restaurants and hangouts are located.  That spawned the term “dragging Main,” a euphemism to describe cruising between local venues – such as Burger King, Sonic, McDonalds or White Castle fast food shops along Main Street – seeing and being seen by one’s peers.

In some very small rural towns, young people may gather in a farm field or along a river; in larger cities it could be at a large shopping mall.

Young people in Mumbai, India, and Muscat, Oman also have their versions of dragging Main.  But as I learned on a recent trip, the rules of these interactions can vary greatly.

In Mumbai, one of those “dragging Main” venues is on the shoulder of a major highway.

When I am working in India, this stretch of road sits between my hotel and the office, so I go past it every evening. I first mentioned it a few years ago in a feature story I wrote about a man dealing with the tragic loss of his wife and having to drive past this area. It was a sad tale that put a heart-breaking spin on the upbeat theme of budding love.  As time has passed, this stretch of road remains a hot spot.

It’s fun to see young men and women pulling off for a few minutes of private time together – sitting together on the motorbike, sharing an embrace –  in full view of thousands of passing motorists. Many young people live with their parents and don’t have private space where they can visit with a girlfriend or boyfriend. So they hang out there, enjoying each other’s company while snuggling and kissing. These are very intimate moments playing out in plain view of passersby who care to look. And it is fun to look.

India is a mix of mostly Hindu and Muslim religions, and this type of behavior seems to be considered normal – I suppose as long as the parents don’t find out about it.

I recounted the story of the Mumbai Lover’s Lane to colleagues in Muscat, Oman,  recently. Oman is a traditionally conservative Muslim country in the Middle East, where most women wear traditional Muslim dress such as abayas, and most men wear the traditional dishdasha white robes. Morning prayers are broadcast over loudspeakers throughout the city at 4 a.m. each day.

After sharing the Lover’s Lane story with my Omani colleagues, one told me of a similar place where young people go to visit with each other there in Muscat. He said it sounded similar to the Mumbai scene and described a place with lots of shops and coffee houses where young people go to socialize.

Then, in a matter-of-fact tone, he added, “But there is no touching. It is against the law here” and then went back to typing on his laptop.

It was just a casual observation and statement of fact – and yet it just stopped me in my tracks.  The contrast between his comment and what I’ve seen in other countries was just striking. Guiding young people in the rules and nuance of courtship and keeping them out of trouble is – and always has been – an epic struggle that vexes both parents and youth alike.  I’m not sure any culture has mastered that challenge just yet, but in many ways it’s reassuring to know the struggle is a shared one with other cultures around the world.